HOPING

Got a place to live. The seasonal job has ended. I got a prospecting job to check out Friday, but that doesn't look like it'll be doable. My son is in a facility, for now, that will determine what they think his needs are. He has plans to run away with a girlfriend and help her take care of her little sister. My girls are seemingly happy in their new schools. Basically, it's a relatively normal mix of good and bad in a not so normal situation.



The place we moved to is a HUD apartment complex based on income. First time I ever lived in one of these places and I'm mixed about it. I kind of feel like I'm living in a prison. Some friend said, "At least you have your own place". But the amount and type of rules don't quite feel like my own. I'm grateful I have a place I won't be kicked out of based on inability to pay rent, but there are so many other reasons to be kicked out that it looks a little bleak.

My awesome seasonal job is now done until the new season. Pretty sure I'm wanted to come back because my name was put on a list for next season. I definitely want to go back. A friend that worked at that job with me let me know of another one the temp agency is hiring for. It's 30 minutes away and I don't have a car. I need to work just while the kids are in school and pretty much no place is like that. I'm going to go to the orientation and see if it can be worked out though.

At this moment, my son is in a facility to try to determine his real needs. I was told it's a good possibility that will be out of home placement for a while because he's definitely a candidate for that kind of suggestion. That's the kind of thing I've continuously tried to avoid but will do whatever is thought will be best to help him succeed in life and stop going the route he has been going. I can still see this sweetness in his eyes sometimes. I know jail will tear that out of him. I'm hoping he will start thinking and stop going the way he has been going. He told his caseworker he plans to get a job, move out with his girlfriend, and help her take care of her little sister of whom she supposedly has custody. This girl is 16 and I know still lives with her mother so I think something has been mistranslated.

My daughters like their new schools so far. The older one was really skeptical before going, but she seems to have warmed up to it after actually going. The youngest likes her schools too but says she's already being picked on. She also tells me that her teacher said it's not serious unless it's physical. Considering all these kids committing suicide for this kind of crap I don't know how she figures this. Hopefully, what I tell my daughter about the things other people say sticks more than the garbage they say to her.

First and foremost - anyone feeling the need to cut someone else down usually has a problem with them self or within their life. I also let her know that when she stops caring what they say will be when she is happier.
When someone tells her she's ugly -  I told her we are all ugly to someone but beautiful to someone else.
When someone tells her she is stupid - you're not, your grades and ability to catch on academically prove that. Most kids nowadays could use some more common sense though.
If they hit her, she has my permission to hit back because she doesn't have to take it. I just expect her not to be the one to start that crap.

Those are the only things I can think of right now.

I titled this hoping because I try to keep hoping things will still get better than they are. I'm mostly content at the moment, albeit a lot anxious.